Speaking as someone who is sometimes tempted to say “just you wait” BUT WHO ALSO struggled a lot with expectations which did not reflect my reality at any given time—the Just You Waiters are often seeking validation of their own current experience. They want to be seen. To be heard and understood—because, I think this is one core desire of every mother. We are so often misunderstood, belittled, and overlooked. I think the underlying thought is, “This is what humanity (read: mothers) have done since the beginning of time. Why are you so special? Obviously, you’re not. Suck it up and do the dishes” (at least, that’s what my internal voice says, lol). Every moment is unique. Every moment can be beautiful and heart breaking. The trick, perhaps, is to listen. To let be what is—both as a mother emerging and as one who has exceeded those early stages. We’re all emerging, aren’t we?
I love this take! I can definitely sense the need for validation when some of the “just you waits” have come my way. Many times how I have reacted to these comments depends on who is speaking to me — is it a stranger? A nosy acquaintance? A loved one? I absolutely agree with the trick being just to listen — from my end, too! While I may feel frustrated and hormonal about many of these comments right now, haha, someone else may be feeling the exact same way and is simply trying to give me a lighthearted nod toward what the future might hold. I have to be more understanding, too. We all just wanna feel that love and support! 🤍
Yes! Exactly! Two-way street. I love that we can open the conversation, from both sides, on topics like these. ❤️ And I agree: knowing who you are talking to can make all the difference in your immediate reaction/verbal response. Wise!
This is beautiful. I write in my substack all about pregnancy and birth and the after for my family. So love that I found you through Christianna. Hope to connect some more. Many happy trails for you and your family and so glad you are able to see the beauty, too :).
I was at a friends baby shower last week and she was sharing all the thing she couldn’t wait to do and my response was wow, you make it all sound so magical. I regret it, I was tired, it is hard to stare the hope of a new mother in the face and not because of what the just you waits could be, at least for me, I wish I could start over again and embrace the beginning with more ease and grace. I am so excited for you, I hope your transition into motherhood is nothing but easeful. Just you wait until that baby is really here, even in the hard moments, it is magical because you made them and they are a living breathing being in front you.
Beautiful and thoughtful letter, I would say many of us feel this way often. Your honesty is wonderful.🤍 Even years later I find myself feeling this way most days when faced with others either close loved ones or strangers.
Be excited about the present moments small and big. They are different for everyone however for me that was a simple walk together out in the sunshine of the summer listening to the birds. Sending you love always ❤️
Speaking as someone who is sometimes tempted to say “just you wait” BUT WHO ALSO struggled a lot with expectations which did not reflect my reality at any given time—the Just You Waiters are often seeking validation of their own current experience. They want to be seen. To be heard and understood—because, I think this is one core desire of every mother. We are so often misunderstood, belittled, and overlooked. I think the underlying thought is, “This is what humanity (read: mothers) have done since the beginning of time. Why are you so special? Obviously, you’re not. Suck it up and do the dishes” (at least, that’s what my internal voice says, lol). Every moment is unique. Every moment can be beautiful and heart breaking. The trick, perhaps, is to listen. To let be what is—both as a mother emerging and as one who has exceeded those early stages. We’re all emerging, aren’t we?
I love this take! I can definitely sense the need for validation when some of the “just you waits” have come my way. Many times how I have reacted to these comments depends on who is speaking to me — is it a stranger? A nosy acquaintance? A loved one? I absolutely agree with the trick being just to listen — from my end, too! While I may feel frustrated and hormonal about many of these comments right now, haha, someone else may be feeling the exact same way and is simply trying to give me a lighthearted nod toward what the future might hold. I have to be more understanding, too. We all just wanna feel that love and support! 🤍
Yes! Exactly! Two-way street. I love that we can open the conversation, from both sides, on topics like these. ❤️ And I agree: knowing who you are talking to can make all the difference in your immediate reaction/verbal response. Wise!
This is beautiful. I write in my substack all about pregnancy and birth and the after for my family. So love that I found you through Christianna. Hope to connect some more. Many happy trails for you and your family and so glad you are able to see the beauty, too :).
I was at a friends baby shower last week and she was sharing all the thing she couldn’t wait to do and my response was wow, you make it all sound so magical. I regret it, I was tired, it is hard to stare the hope of a new mother in the face and not because of what the just you waits could be, at least for me, I wish I could start over again and embrace the beginning with more ease and grace. I am so excited for you, I hope your transition into motherhood is nothing but easeful. Just you wait until that baby is really here, even in the hard moments, it is magical because you made them and they are a living breathing being in front you.
Beautiful and thoughtful letter, I would say many of us feel this way often. Your honesty is wonderful.🤍 Even years later I find myself feeling this way most days when faced with others either close loved ones or strangers.
Be excited about the present moments small and big. They are different for everyone however for me that was a simple walk together out in the sunshine of the summer listening to the birds. Sending you love always ❤️